England ‘Fans’ Accused Of Waving White Flag

Bill Hack chief football correspondent

England supporters have been accused of being unpatriotic and overly pessimistic ahead of the World Cup clash with Germany on Sunday – after thousands of ‘fans’ took to the streets waving white flags.

Don Fabio Capello’s men qualified for the last 16 of the tournament with a 1-0 victory over Slovenia on Wednesday afternoon.

But the euphoria of reaching the knock out stages swiftly turned to despondency as the nation faced up to a clash with arch-nemesis Germany in the next round.

And with it the fate of a ‘certain death penalty’ as punishment for failing to finish top of the group.

“Its amazing. There are people everywhere flying their white flag – clearly terrified of what the Germans will do to us,” said one observer.

“People are walking down the street dressed in flags, flying them from cars and painting them on their faces. They are scared shitless.

“They obviously think it may elicit some sympathy or enable us to reach some agreement.

“Its outrageous. We should be getting behind our boys, encouraging them and have confidence in them to win the game. Its unpatriotic and overly pessimistic.”

However, many fans insist the caution and desire to reach an amicable solution to the ‘do-or-die encounter’ is justifiable.

In recent history Germany have inflicted some devastating defeats on the English, most notably in 1970, 1990, 1996 and 2001.

And some fans insist England should surrender to Germany, as they fear the Germans may opt for the excruciatingly ‘death by penalties’ – a slow and torturous end which is banned in many countries.

This sentence has become increasingly common after FIFA abandoned experiments with ‘sudden death’ a few years ago, despite protests from human rights groups.

* This story is constructed from 89% fiction and the rest is invented


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