Archive for ‘Planet sport’

July 10, 2010

Fifa Cast English Villain

Bill Hack chief football correspondent

Fifa have denied perpetuating stereotypes by casting English referee Howard Webb as chief-villain for Sunday’s World Cup showpiece.

The World’s governing body was left humiliated after their failure to introduce video technology contributed to England’s exit from the World.

And now Fifa want to gain revenge for all the negative publicity, tedious questions and troublesome press conferences by appointing an English scapegoat for the final between Holland and Spain.

But groups have accused Fifa of perpetuating stereotypes of the English villain so prevalent in Hollywood during the 1980s and 1990s.

“What we are seeing here is a classic case of stereotyping – it’s scandalous,” said an eminent Professor.

“Just because Mr Webb has an English accent and a bald head does not mean he is evil.

“I thought we had moved past all this.”

In response, Fifa chief Septic Blatter said: “Ha, ha, ha – didn’t see that one coming did you.rr

“Fifa will always have the last laugh. Ha, ha, ha.”

* This story is plain wrong.

March 5, 2010

PLANET SPORT: The stuff we couldn’t make up…

Fools’ Gold?

April 2009 – Birmingham co-owner David Gold tells the Guardain: “To have an impact in these difficult economic times we need to reduce ticket prices by 50%. This couldn’t be done overnight as all clubs have contracted expenditures and overheads they need to see through, but it could perhaps be introduced for the start of the 2010-11 season and be carried out incrementally at roughly 17% per season for three seasons. Based on past experience, I genuinely believe this would eventually result in crowds rising by at least a quarter, maybe more.”

October 2009 – Gold tells Radio 5 live: “The model for reducing prices doesn’t work. In the event that you cut your prices in half you don’t double your attendance. Fans will love him (new owner Carson Yeung if he reduces ticket prices) but he will get relegated because it doesn’t work.” He added: “Often fans say if you cut your prices you will fill the stadium – it is not true.”
January 2010 – Gold, now West Ham co-owner, tells the Telegraphy: “If Man United are paying £50 million a year in interest, if they didn’t have that debt, then they could use that £50 million to reduce ticket prices.”
March 2010 – Gold tells the BBC that he would love to reduce ticket prices for the fans but – despite being co-owner of West Ham and responsible amongst other things the ticket prices at his club – it is not his responsibility to set entry prices, maintaining the Premier League should be leading the way.

Red Knights or Red Devils?
A group of “City experts” are planning to buy Manchester United and save the club from owners the Glazers.
Among the group are:
Paul Marshall – co-founded of hedge fund Marshall Wace. According to the Independent, the hedge fund “hit the headlines selling short the shares of the struggling Halifax Bank of Scotland and Northern Rock, and then in front of MPs defended the hedge fund industry and short sellingMPs defending .
Jim O’Neill – chief strategist at Goldman Sachs. “Think massive bonuses for staff only a year after the global banking bailout, think advice to Greece on how to circumvent EU borrowing rules, think investment bank famously dubbed as a ‘great vampire squid wrapped around the face of humanity’,” says the Independent.
February 26, 2010

PLANET SPORT: The stuff we couldn’t make up…

Tall Storrie..

Feb 10 – Portsmouth chief executive Peter Storrie tells the BBC “the club is looking in a much better position than it was a couple of months ago.”

February 26 – Portsmouth prepare to enter administration later in the day.

Collective amnesia

May 2009 – Swimming sensation Michael Phelps is pictured appearing to smoke marijuana through a bong at a student party just weeks after creating history at the Beijing Olympic Games.

February 2010 – Swimming legend Michael Phelps has became the first official Ambassador of the Youth Olympic Games.

February 20, 2010

PLANET SPORT: The stuff we couldn’t make up…

Out of the Woods?

Tiger Woods today spoke publicly for the first time since the car crash that led to a series of lurid allegations about his private life.

Woods spoke of his regrets, and selfishness and his desire to change.

In his new-found wisdom and humility Woods decided to schedule his press conference apology in the middle of WGC-Accenture world match-play championship in Arizona.

The irony was not lost on Ernie Els, who described it as “selfish”. But then the tournament sponsors, Accenture, did drop Woods following the rumours of numerous affairs.

It’s not about the money: Wasps winger Paul Sackey

“I’ve made my decision now, I’ve just got to go with it and make the best out of it. I’m definitely not going for the money,” he told skysports.

“I would have stayed at Wasps for a little bit more.”

Hammer and thong

West Ham’s new co-owner David Sullivan is set to bring back the Hammerettes, the club’s raunchy cheerleaders,to Upton Park.

Where did the former pornography entrepeneur get his idea to bring back the scantily clad, flesh-flashing wonders?

February 12, 2010

PLANET SPORT: The stuff we couldn’t make up…

Sno-go for Winter Olympics?

Concerns are growing ahead of the Winter Olympics in Vancouver about the lack of snow for the quadrennial festival of slipping, sliding and skidding.

Snow has been transported in from elsewhere in an attempt to ready the area for the Games.

“Global warming of is a worry,” IOC President Jacque Rogge told AFP.

“In awarding the event to a host city, we must look at the climate and snow conditions and geography, as well as ways to alleviate any lack of snow.”

Blatter backs Terry

FIFA president Sepp Blatter gives his take on the sacking of John Terry following allegations of the defender’s affair with a team-mates girlfriend.

“Listen, this is a special approach in the Anglo-Saxon countries,” he said. “If this had happened in let’s say Latin countries then I think he would have been applauded.”

Dyer mess for West Ham

It was revealed this week that former England winger Kieron Dyer could cost West Ham a staggering £30million – having made five appearances and scored no goals in his two years at the club.

That would equate to an appearance fee of £6million a time – The Virgin Mary is available for half the price.

February 5, 2010

PLANET SPORT: The stuff we couldn’t make up…


Portsmouth have a new owner again and he wants nothing to do with the club.

Despite taking control of Portsmouth, Hong Kong-based businessman Balram Chainrai insists he has no interest in running the cash-strapped club.

”I have zero interest in buying Portsmouth and it’s completely untrue that I am the new owner of the club,” Chainrai told the South China Morning Post. ”As far as I am concerned, I have just confiscated the shares of the previous owners.

”It’s nothing to do with controlling the club. I don’t know anything about running a football club. I just love the game and that’s why I’ve taken this action. We have exercised our right to take control of the shares, and to remove the previous owners.”

May be not the most typical of rallying cries from a new owner.

But then as recent Portsmouth owners go, it is hardly bucking the trend.


Following the horrific attack on their team bus in the run up to the African Nations Cup Togo have been banned for the next two tournaments and fined $50,000 for withdrawing from this year’s competition.

The fact that a Togo assistant coach and press officer were killed and several players injured in the ambush by rebels in the Angolan province of Cabinda does not seem to extend to exceptional circumstances.

Confederation of African Football (CAF) have judged that because the Togolese government ordered the team home they were in contravention of regulations that banned political authorities from intervening in such matters.